Germany – understand-culture

Yea-sayer Nay-sayer

The Yea-sayer Nay-sayer is a so-called school-opera written by Bertolt Brecht, Elisabeth Hauptmann and Kurt Weill in 1930. Initially it was titled The Yea-sayer, and the plot revolved around the question of whether an individual must be agreeable to sacrificing themselves for the good of society.

In the first version of the piece a boy gives permission for his own execution. After a sting of discussions with students and workers Brecht’s The yea-sayer was modified into a second version, where the yea-sayer is presented in contrast to a nay-sayer.

This nay-sayer calls the blind obedience of the yea-sayer into question. The function of the yea-sayer has seen a variety of literary interpretations; perhaps the most common interpretation being that the character represents the expression of a false obedience with regard to authority and social norms.

Indeed, the term yea-sayer has a negative connotation in the German culture. To be a yea-sayer means to say amen to everything. Not to resist. To accept anything. Better to be a nay-sayer in this case.

Nay-sayers may be more complicated and unpleasant for those around them, but at least they stand up for their own beliefs. An (initial) no could simply be a way of expressing oneself first.

Personal liability

Germany is a country based on the rule of law. And there are many laws in Germany. The Germans abide by them. For Germans, rules and regulations are one way to reduce risk of personal liability. This can make working with Germans difficult for non-Germans. A conditional German yes might very well be based on the fear of being made personally responsible for the outcome of an agreement.

Working with Germans or setting foot on German soil immediately involves coming in contact with German laws. Why are escalators in Germany so slow? Because the store owner is liable for any accidents.

Bus drivers in Germany will only let passengers enter or exit at designated bus stops, even if it is only ten meters away. For legal reasons. When sending an email to a group of friends the other email addresses should not be visible. Personal email addresses are private and protected by Datenschutz, information privacy protection laws.

Computers often need repair. Employees of companies are not permitted to take action, unless they are in the IT department. If repairing leads to further damage, the employee is personally liable. For it is not their job, but the employer‘s, to repair company equipment.

The same goes for cleaning. Rolling up your sleeves and cleaning dirty windows in your office is a nice gesture, but not a good idea in Germany. The employee is liable for any injury incurred during the cleaning. The company‘s insurance company certainly will not pick up the costs. And the company can even charge the employee for not focusing on the work they are paid for.

German laws also prescribe clearly in which locations what kinds of commercial space can be used for. Many an organization has learned the hard way that the space they rented cannot be used for the purposes they intended.

Ways to say No in German

Nein, it’s a very popular word in Germany. The Germans use it all the time. So much so, that they have all sorts of nuanced ways to say it.

No

The German no is more the rule than the exception. However, its level of firmness is based on context. The no can range from hard to flexible. Identifying the barriers to the yes reveals that range. Examples

No

German Approach

American Approach

A no in the American context is more the exception than the rule. Americans pride themselves on being can-do people. They feel uncomfortable saying no. They couch their no in affirmative words. Examples

American View

Germans are often and quickly (mis)perceived as born nay-sayers. They can come across as unfriendly, uncooperative, not team-players. The German „no“ can be communicated so quickly and unabashedly that an American does not consider the possibility that it is the German way of saying:

„Sorry, I cannot commit to that right now, or without having thought about it.“ The attempt is not made to determine through discussion to what degree the „no“ might be a different way of communicating a conditional „yes“.

The danger in this interaction is twofold. Firstly, an otherwise mutually beneficial agreement is not struck. Secondly, and more unfortunate, the German colleague might be unfairly labeled as a „nay-sayer“, an uncooperative colleague to be avoided.

That person may never become aware of how they are misperceived by their American colleagues, thus affording no opportunity to correct the misperception, to correct the unfair label as „Herr Dr. No“.

German View

No less irritating for the Germans is the American no, which they almost never hear. Instead they get a conditional yes, which is communicated with terms and phrases which indicate clearly to the non-native speaker a positive, an affirmative response, a yes. Germans ask themselves what is so difficult about saying either yes or no.

Although Germans speak good to excellent English, few are capable of understanding the nuances of American English. And, the more complex the material discussed, the more politically sensitive situation it is embedded in, all the more subtle the language used by Americans.

A highly conditional „yes“ in the American context is in most cases a polite form of a „no“, a „polite no“, understood by each American involved, but perhaps misunderstood by a German to be a „yes“. For it is a sign of professionalism and finesse in the United States to be able to communicate rejection in a positive and affirmative way.

The effect? Two parties have an opposite understanding of the interaction. One believes to have entered into an agreement. The other believes to have clearly communicated that agreement was not arrived at.

Worse than the miscommunication, there lurks the greater danger of Germans drawing the conclusion that Americans don‘t hold up their side of the bargain. To be unreliable (unzuverlaessig), „not keeping your word“, on even the most minor of matters is considered highly negative in the German context.

To be labeled unzuverlaessig is to be labeled with almost a character flaw. It‘s a label which can take time to have peeled off.

Advice to Germans

Your German „no“ is harsh and unfriendly for the American ear. Either take it out of your repertoire altogether, or at least soften it. Explain your reluctance in a more diplomatic way. You won‘t be accused of being a therapist.

Enter into a dialogue with your American colleague by stating the reasons why you cannot (yet) enter into an agreement. Then give that person a chance to overcome your reluctance.

Strive to negotiate a mutually beneficial deal, with both having receivables and deliverables. Keep in mind, you may need and want assistance from this very same colleague at a later time.

Advice to Americans

Communicate more literally with your German colleagues. If you cannot enter into an agreement, simply state so. Provide your reasons, communicate regret, but try not to pack your „no“ into „wads of cotton“, as the Germans say. They won‘t break down into tears.

If you are willing to enter into an agreement, give clear indications to what degree your „yes“ is binding. Parameters can change. Use a percentage: „Sure, Hans, I can deliver that by next Thursday. But, I have a lot going on at the moment. I can guarantee it 80%. Let‘s talk again on Tuesday.“