Little Women by Louisa May Alcott. The March sisters’ growth is closely tied to feedback from family, friends, and mentors. Jo, in particular, responds emotionally to feedback on her writing and work, viewing it as a reflection of her personal worth and aspirations.
Fruits of the Labors
The Germans value being self-critical. Inflated, positive feedback threatens self-critique, threatens one‘s ability to identify and learn from mistakes and weaknesses. Germans prefer that their work results speak for themself. They value the quiet, focused worker who is not easily distracted by comments about their performance.
Studies, though, document that this ideal is not always in the best interest of employees and their companies. More than half of all German managers and subject-area experts feel that they deserve more praise. Only a quarter are satisfied with the current level of positive feedback. 14% responded that they receive no praise at all for their work. Only 3% stated that they need any additional praise.
An American in Berlin
From an American:
“I started working for a German company a few years ago and was immediately excited to find that they had a culture of frequent feedback.
As the weeks went on, the feedback kept on coming. Very quickly, I began to see a pattern; it was almost entirely negative. All delivered amazingly well, with examples of how I’d fucked up alongside helpful guidance on how I might want to improve.
The onslaught continued; it was relentless. It became apparent to me that there was very little chance of me passing my probation period if this continued. So I buckled down, pushed myself to breaking point and put in those extra hours to save my job. But still, it kept continuing critical feedback, after critical feedback.
For the first time in my career, I was going to fail my probation period. There was no point in getting feedback on how I improve the situation. I was getting it daily. I was just shit.
So finally, my final probation review came around. Everything was excellent; the company was super happy with my progress and delivery. I passed my probation period with flying colours. But it had broken me. I was fried and burnt out.”
From a German:
“I have recently started working in an entirely new industry, leading a small team. Shortly after joining, my team’s scope changed to a new problem space.
Again, this company had an active feedback culture and processes. Constant feedback was given to the team every two weeks from leadership. As we built the team and worked out how we were going to achieve our new goals, we got feedback all the time. And it was always positive.
This didn’t play well for me. I knew that there was no way that we could be that good, we were a team with little experience in what we were doing, how could we be doing that well? There must be areas for improvement.
As this continued, positive feedback began to feel more and more empty. I went hunting for critical feedback. Unfortunately, this manifested in me trying to find critical input for the team bellow me. I became overly focused on trying to find areas for improvement in the team.
The problem came to a head when one of my team said ‘I only get negative feedback from you, and I don’t know what to do about it.’ I was so focused on finding the negative areas that we could improve on, and I had not given any support for improvement. I had also failed to celebrate the positive.”
deeply personal
9 to 5 (1980). Three women, frustrated by their sexist boss, band together to improve their toxic workplace. The feedback they receive – dismissal, condescension, and lack of recognition – is deeply personal and motivates them to take action. Their eventual success is celebrated as both professional and personal vindication.
Impersonal Critique
In the German context feedback about one‘s work is in and of itself not personal. Germans – team leads as well as members – can argue vehemently about business topics and at the same time have a friendly, collegial working relationship. German management can criticize harshly an employee but still respect and personally like that individual. In Germany feedback is not personal.
In German team meetings open, honest, direct feedback is not only permitted, it is desired. Weaknesses in individual performance are addressed by team lead and members alike. The criticism, however, is not meant, and is not taken, as a personal attack, not jemandem etwas ins Gesicht sagen (to tell them off), but more to „get a it on the table“, in den Raum stellen.
Jemandem etwas ins Gesicht sagen: to say something critical to another person‘s face; to say something mean, unfair, provoking; to tell someone the unadultered truth; to give another person „a piece of your mind.“
Etwas in den Raum stellen: to put something in the room; to raise a question, a problem; to comment on, to make an observation; to bring a subject into the discussion.
„Not criticized is praise enough“
There is a logic to why Germans rarely give praise. They believe that being one‘s own most severe critic is the prerequisite for working independently, for self-management. Praise is given and expected sparingly. The following expression reveals the German logic: Nicht geschimpft, ist genug gelobt or Not criticized is praise enough.
Germans learn at an early age to expect more critique than praise, from parents, teachers, sports coaches. Young Germans are trained to be self-critical, to be wary of undeserved praise. Experts in education and child-rearing warn of the dangers of too much praise. It can quickly lead to oversized egos, to overrating one‘s abilities, to losing touch with reality.
If praise is given, then it should come from an external, neutral, critical source. German children learn from an early age on not to put their achievements on display, not to brag, but instead to be reserved and modest. Every German child has heard at least once that Eigenlob stinkt, that self-praise stinks.
Fair Critical Feedback
Germans consider critical feedback to be unfair if it does not include concrete recommendations on how to improve on weaknesses. They believe that people can only improve on what they understand to be suboptimal. Critial feedback, the Germans believe, should therefore be communicated clearly, avoiding any use of politically correct language.
The more objective and impersonal the critical feedback is stated, the less chance it will be taken personally. Feedback experts in Germany go as far as to view personal relationships within teams as a barrier to honest, effective feedback. They often recommend neutral third parties to facilitate particularly critical feedback discussions.
Self-praise stinks
Eigenlob stink: self-praise stinks; it is dishonourable; those who praise themselves make themselves unpopular. Lobhudelei: tossing praise about; exaggerated praise, typically self-praise; for mediocre work. Etwas hochjubelen: to praise something or someone to the high heavens; overblown praise, undeserved, unwarranted.
The Ikarus myth. Ikarus is a figure of Greek mythololgy. His father, Daidalos, in order to escape from the labyrinth on the Greek island of Crete, built wings our of feathers and wax. Although Daidalos warned his son not to fly to close to the sun, Ikarus in his self-confidence did not heed his father‘s warning. The wax in his wings melted, he crashed to the sea and drowned. The lesson taught is that hubris – conceit, over self-estimation – leads to a fall.
Germans are very wary of over self-estimation.
“Coach me“
Americans expect to be coached by their team lead. If the team lead has accurately identified weaknesses in a team member, and has communicated them clearly, fairly and diplomatically in a feedback talk, then it is expected that the team lead then coach her „player.“
Just as a basketball coach will take extra time with a player after practice to work on dribbling or shooting skills, so too a good manager in the American business context will take the time to explain to the employee how to perform certain tasks better: give presentations, write reports, perform calculations, attach the part to the machine, handle customer issues, work with external suppliers, and manager their own team. The list is endless.
If the team lead, however, is not in a position to coach her player directly – due to time constraints or perhaps she is not a master of the skill herself – then she should, at a minimum, know where to send that team member in order to be coached, taught, instructed, advised.
Coach. Player. Americans want to be coached. American sports coaches are deeply involved in how their players play.
group performance
Die Welle (The Wave, 2008). Context: A high school teacher conducts an experiment to demonstrate the appeal of authoritarianism. Illustration: The feedback given by the teacher to students – and among students themselves – remains focused on behavior and group performance, not on individual personalities. The film explores the consequences of depersonalized, performance-based evaluation in a group dynamic.