On Amazon.com, there are 125,927 search results for books involving small talk. On BarnesandNoble.com, thee are 328 books found under small talk. Titles include The Fine Art of Small Talk: How to Start a Conversation, Keep it Going, Build Networking Skills—and Leave a Positive Impression by Debra Fine and Turn Small Talk into Big Deals: Using 4 Key Conversation Styles to Customize Your Networking Approach, Build Relationships, and Win More Clients by Don Gabor.
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Small Talk as Big Talk
Big talk can come in the shape of small talk. A seemingly insignificant conversation can involve important information. One person would like to address important, even sensitive, topics without addressing them directly.
The hope is that the other party will respond accordingly, thus enabling the conversation to transition from small to big talk. In some cases, however, it is the intent of the one party to gain valuable information without the other party aware that they are divulging it.
Gift of gab
In his post on Forbes online – Six Reasons Small Talk Is Very Important and How To Get Better At It – Brett Nelson writes:
„Whether getting a job, working with colleagues, winning new clients, entertaining existing ones, all of it requires small talk. You better have the gift of gab.“
He then quotes from How To Get A Job On Wall Street, written by Scott Hoover, Associate Professor of Finance at Washington and Lee University: “In trying to generate business, the deal pitch is obviously critical. What is not so obvious is that simple, seemingly innocuous conversation with potential clients can be just as important. Companies want to hire people who can think on their feet.”
MerriamWebster defines gab as: to talk a lot in an informal way usually about things that are not important or serious; to talk in a rapid or thoughtless manner. First know use 1786. Synonyms: babble, blab, cackle, chatter, chat, jabber, rattle, run on, schmooze, talk, twitter.
Find Commonalities
In his book Influence: the Psychology of Persuasion, American psychology and marketing professor Robert Beno Cialdini lists likability as one of the 6 key principles of influence.
And a way to get people to like you, Cialdini argues, is to “rapidly seek out commonalities” with that person. Moreover, the connection doesn’t have to be unique or meaningful – a shared interest in sports or a similar vacation location are both sufficient to help make someone like you.
Small talk allows people to find commonalities quickly, and thus to have influence over each other right from the beginning.
More books about Small Talk
Amazon Germany lists 196 books with ‘small talk’ in their title. The best sellers are Small Talk für Dummies, Small Talk – Nie Wieder Sprachlos (Never Again Speechless) and Small Talk – Die Besten Themen (The Best Topics).
The typical table of contents reads: What is small talk? What purpose does small talk serve? In what situations do you use small talk? When can small talk be dangerous or uncalled for? When do you need small talk? What topics are appropriate in small talk? Which topics are dangerous in small talk? Small talk and body language. How to react to small talk? How to deal with small talk in difficult situations?
Nearly two hundred books. What does this tell us about small talk in Germany?
What is a deliverable?
In his What Is a Deliverable in Project Management?, Kermit Burley, of Demand Media, writes: „In project management, a deliverable is a product or service that is given to your client. A deliverable usually has a due date and is tangible, measurable and specific.
A deliverable can be given to either an external or internal customer and satisfies a milestone or due date that is created and produced in the project plan. A deliverable can be a software product, a design document, a training program or other asset that is required by the project plan.“
Unfortunate Selling Techniques
In the children’s book series, A Series of Unfortunate Events by Lemony Snicket (the pen name of American Daniel Handler), three recently orphaned children are initially placed in the custody of Mr. Poe, the banker who is in charge of the large fortune that they will inherit when Violet, the eldest, comes of age. Mr. Poe soon finds a distant relative who is willing to adopt the orphans, and the children move in with Count Olaf, their third/fourth cousin several times removed.
As it turns out, Count Olaf is not interested in raising the orphans, but only in stealing their parents’ fortune. After his first failed attempt to steal it, he has to go on the run to avoid the police, and the children are sent to live with a different relative.
Undeterred, Count Olaf will attempt to steal the orphans’ fortune multiple times over the course of the next several books, each time masquerading as a respectable member of the local community. In the first book, he is a count, in the second, he pretends to be a herpetological assistant, in the third, a retired captain, and so on.
Every time that the children discover one of Count Olaf’s disguises, they attempt to elicit the help of their legal guardian and/or the banker Mr. Poe. Even though the orphans point out mistakes in the count’s disguises, Count Olaf is so skilled at selling himself that the adults ignore the mistakes and contradictions in his product (his disguises) until they become extremely obvious.
Win Friends and Influence People
Dale Carnegie (1888-1955) was a lecturer, writer and developer of courses on self-improvement, salesmanship, public speaking, and interpersonal skills. His How to Win Friends and Influence People (1936) was a record-breaking bestseller which remains popular today.
His books and Dale Carnegie Training courses focus on building self-confidence, strengthening people and communication skills, as well as developing leadership traits. Carnegie believed that it is possible to change other people’s behavior by changing one’s own interaction with them.
How to Win Friends and Influence People is number 509 in Amazon.com’s top book list and has over 1,060 customer reviews on the website with 4.6 out of 5 stars rating.
Additionally, it is one of the top 20 “Best Sales Book” on Monster.com. Operating in over 75 countries, Dale Carnegie Training has been in business since 1912, with clients among the world’s most successful global companies.
Future
When the search term future is keyed in on Amazon.com, 134,329 search results are generated. Some titles found from the search include the following: Future Perfect: The Case for Progress in a Networked Age by Steven Johnson, Physics of the Future: How Science Will Shape Human Destiny and Our Daily Lives by the Year 2100 by Michio Kaku, The Price of Inequality: How Today’s Divided Society Endangers Our Future by Joseph E. Stiglitz, and The $100 Startup: Reinvent the Way You Make a Living, Do What You Love, and Create a New Future by Chris Guillebeau.
Business Storytelling
Business Storytelling for Dummies. Author Karen Dietz. What does amazon(dot)com say about the book in order to promote it?
Learn to: translate data, facts, and figures into rich, captivating messages; harness the power of good storytelling to influence and motivate employees; effectively convey messages to buyers and funders; connect with your audience and drive your business to new heights; use storytelling to influence people and move them to action
Use stories to tap into their imaginations and translate sterile facts and stagnant case studies into exciting concepts they can identify with.