In the Analects, Confucius says: “In attending on a gentleman, there are three errors. To speak before it is one’s turn to speak is called rashness. Not to speak when it is one’s turn is called concealment. To speak without first watching his expression is called blindness.” (侍于君子有三愆：言未及之而言谓之躁，言及之而不言谓之隐，未见颜色而言谓之瞽。)
Speaking Before a Teacher
The opening chapter of the Book of Rites, Quli, sets out how the young speak in front of elders and teachers. “When an elder has not raised a matter, do not cut in with talk.” (长者不及，毋儳言) “Sitting with a teacher, when the teacher asks a question, answer only when he has finished.”
Meeting a teacher on the road, a student hurries forward and stands straight. “If the teacher speaks to him, he answers. If the teacher does not speak to him, he hurries away.” In front of a friend of his father, he does not answer unless he is asked.
Gentle Remonstrance
In the Analects, Confucius says: “In serving one’s father and mother, remonstrate gently. If they show that they will not follow the advice, remain respectful and do not oppose them. Work hard and do not complain.” (事父母几谏，见志不从，又敬不违，劳而不怨。)
The Handian dictionary defines 几谏 as “to remonstrate in a tactful, roundabout way.”
Comrade, Not Director
A Party text of 1978 told members: “Within the Party, everyone addresses each other as comrade. Do not use official titles.” (党内一律互称同志，不要叫官衔。) In 2016, the Several Norms on Political Life Within the Party repeated the rule: “Within the Party, everyone is called comrade.”
A 2018 article on the Party’s official website still listed addressing people by their official post as a habit to be avoided. The rule had been written down twice, 38 years apart.
Mi Heng Plays the Drum
According to the Book of the Later Han, Mi Heng “had talent and eloquence from his youth, but he was proud and harsh and liked to defy his times and slight others.” Cao Cao wanted to humiliate him and made him a drummer at a banquet. Mi Heng stripped naked before Cao Cao, put on the drummer’s clothes and played on. Cao Cao laughed: “I meant to shame him, and he shamed me.”
Cao Cao did not want to be seen as unable to tolerate a famous man, so he sent Mi Heng to Liu Biao. Mi Heng insulted Liu Biao too and was sent on to Huang Zu. At a banquet, he insulted Huang Zu, who had him killed. Mi Heng was 26.
Object, Then Carry Out
Under Article 60 of the Civil Servant Law, as revised in 2018, a civil servant who believes a superior’s decision or order is wrong may propose to the superior that it be corrected or withdrawn. If the superior does not change it, or demands immediate action, the civil servant must carry it out. The superior then bears the consequences.
A civil servant who carries out a clearly illegal decision or order is held responsible for it.
Combat Liberalism
On September 7, 1937, Mao Zedong wrote a short text called Combat Liberalism (反对自由主义). It lists the kinds of liberal behavior inside the Party. The second is “irresponsible criticism behind people’s backs, instead of making suggestions to the organization.”
“Saying nothing to people’s faces, but talking wildly behind their backs. Saying nothing at the meeting, but talking wildly after it.” (当面不说，背后乱说；开会不说，会后乱说。)
Slander in the Belly
The Records of the Grand Historian tell the fate of Yan Yi, a minister of agriculture under Emperor Wu of Han. Yan had once told the emperor that a new currency made of white deerskin was a bad idea, and the emperor was displeased. Later, a guest spoke to Yan about the problems with a new order. Yan did not reply, but his lips moved slightly.
The official Zhang Tang charged that Yan, a high minister, had seen that the order was harmful, “did not speak up, but slandered it in his belly” (不入言而腹诽). Yan was sentenced to death. “From then on,” the historian writes, “most ministers and officials flattered and sought to please.”
The Meeting at Mianchi
The Records of the Grand Historian describe a meeting at Mianchi between the kings of Qin and Zhao. Over wine, the King of Qin said: “I have heard that the King of Zhao loves music. Please play the zither.” The King of Zhao played. The Qin historian stepped forward and wrote: “On such a day, the King of Qin met the King of Zhao to drink and ordered the King of Zhao to play the zither.”
The Zhao minister Lin Xiangru knelt before the King of Qin with a clay pot and asked him to strike it. When the king refused, Lin said: “Within five paces, I can spatter Your Majesty with the blood of my neck.” The king struck the pot once. Lin had the Zhao historian write: “On such a day, the King of Qin struck the pot for the King of Zhao.”
Lian and Mianzi
In 1944, the Chinese anthropologist Hu Hsien Chin published “The Chinese Concepts of ‘Face'” in the journal American Anthropologist. Hu described two Chinese words for face, lian (脸) and mianzi (面子), as “two sets of criteria by which prestige is gained and status secured or improved.”
Lian, Hu wrote, is “a social sanction for enforcing moral standards and an internalized sanction.” It “is conceived of as being maintained or lost as a whole.”